Chemo Starts Today

 I've been given preliminary medications that are supposed to lower my testosterone levels and otherwise start  controlling the cancer, but the real thing, the heavy duty infusions, start this morning. I've been given a shit-ton of literature to read to tell me about the drug that will be infused at the cancer center -- outpatient -- and I've skimmed it. I'll try to get into more complete detail after the treatment is over. 

I washed up yesterday, first water bath since this difficult period began over three weeks ago. I did a sponge bath in bed, not in the bathroom where I really haven't been in more than three weeks. No, just a couple of tubs of hot water, soap, wash cloths, Chux, and patience. I was doing it myself. Ms Ché prepared the tubs and got the towels and soap and stuff together, but I was feeling well enough to handle the washing process myself, and all went as planned until...

I got up for the fourth or fifth time, took a step to get some clean clothes, and whoops!, down I went. I was right by the bed so I thought I could get myself up. Nope. Wouldn't go. Each time I thought I was about to hoist myself off the floor by hanging onto the bed frame, my leg went out from under me and I was right back where I started from (the Shangri Las were playing on the laptop on the bed... they had some really good music on an album released after their famous period; it should be in a Broadway show, or be the spine of one... hmmm) .

I called out "Help!" and Ms. came in a jiffy. The trick was to get me up. Whoa. After much trial and error, we figured it out but... these falls were what convinced me to go to the ER in the first place, and while they aren't frequent, they're often enough, and I get banged up enough to make it not my favorite thing to do, and at least so far, there's no warning, and no sure way to prevent it. My neurologist said they happen because the cancer has damaged my spine, and in certain positions my spine pinches a nerve which affects the leg muscle, weakens it and I fall. I won't always know when it will happen.

Great.

So we transport me with careful use of walkers and a wheel chair. Got a ramp the other day to facilitate getting me up and down the one step at our house. Seems to work fine, though Ms. was dubious at first. I have two walkers. One was her mother's, the standard "frame." The other is my four wheel walker with a seat. Now I see them everywhere. We have two wheel chairs too, one with the big back wheel I can work myself and the other with small back wheels to facilitate transport. 

So we can get me to appointments and stuff, but I'm really worried about Ms. She has no help around the house with me, and the strain is really showing. I hope we can get someone skilled to help out soon. They say we should be able to, but it may take a while. Well, everything does. 

After the treatment this morning, I'll try to fill in more.