Monday, June 6, 2011

Oh the Sturm! Oh the Drang!

Weiner is GUILTY!!!!!
He admits it!!! The World has come to an End!!!! The Man in the Chair was Right!!!! JUDGEMENT DAY HAS COME!!! He apologized to.... Breitbart!!!! Rend my garments, cover me with ashes! The World has Ended!!!

Jeebus Christmas dancing on a tasty Ritz cracker.

The caterwauling over Mister Weiner's weiner is now beyond the epic proportions once reserved for the Arch Cad Bill Clinton. Of course, it is widely pointed out in the sex-obsessed media (do they ever get laid?) that Weiner is a Clintonista, and so is his long-suffering wife!!!!

Which obviously proves everything. No progressive can ever trust Weiner again. HE. LIED. TO. ME!!!! About his wang!!! AAAAAAAhhhhhhh!

Of course, more importantly, Jon Stewart must have lied to his far more immense audience abut the... ahem... size (not that it matters) of the wang in question. Given that Jon Stewart has a bigger audience than all of Fox News, his lies obviously must mean something.

Look, penne pics are not at all rare in our modern world, certainly not rare on the Intertubez. They -- and cats -- are sort of what the Intertubez were made for. If anyone has a real problem with either Weiner's wang or the fact that he wasn't fully and completely honest about it and the picture of it (nor was his friend Mr. Stewart) and the women he's dated or had online "relationships" with, and whatever else of a personal and/or private nature about his current and past life they want to delve into, I think they really need to figure out how to get a life of their own.

Living vicariously through images of celebrities -- even political celebrities like Anthony Weiner -- is one of the worst habits Americans have had for a very long time. Whatever image of Weiner's sexual purity that "progressives" must have been carrying for them now to keen so loudly and incessantly over his betrayal is just insane.

As Stephen Colbert would say: "Nation. Get over it."

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